Faryal Madad Naqvi
In modern society, “too busy” has become a silent badge worn proudly. “I’d love to but I’m too busy.” “It’s not my fault. I’m too busy”. “I’m just so productive right now”. It assumes a sense of accomplishment, importance, engagement, and swift movement toward a desirable end. The truth of the matter is that in constant motion, “too busy” often means something else entirely. It means, frazzled, time-stuck, or emotionally stretched in directions that ultimately make life worse instead of better.
Consider the average weekday. Your alarm goes off, and before your feet even touch the ground, you’re scrambling through avalanche of text messages, emails, and notifications that flooded in overnight. By the time you get to work, you’ve already had an hour’s full of reminders replaying in your mind. Suddenly it’s lunchtime and you haven’t even realized how you’ve been go-go-going for the past four hours without actually breathing. When you collapse on your couch later that day wondering “Where did the day even go?” – that’s being “too busy”. Quietly. Stressed at home.
Sometimes, people equate frantic movement with productivity. Picture someone in an office space where they’re fielding phone calls, sending emails, constantly getting up to rush meetings. They look exhausted – they look busy. But come end of the week, they didn’t check off their most important project. Meanwhile, the person who took twenty minutes that same week to outline what they needed to do and subsequently, one thing at a time gets it all done and goes home with a smile. It’s not about being busy or accomplishing many things. It’s about determining what matters most and doing just that without distraction.
Relationships also suffer from this underlying busy badge. Maybe you have an acquaintance whom you promise you’ll get back to soon, but for now, you’re just “too busy.” Perhaps your child says, “Look what I made!” and your response is, “Not now” as that “not now” becomes never. That little bit of time quickly becomes distance over time – and it’s often not because people need more than five minutes of your time anyway – but because you’re willing to sacrifice those precious moments with the intentions of filling them later…when you’re not too busy anymore.
Little things like hobbies are mere fleeting thoughts when life gets “too busy.” So many people put off their dreams of taking IT related subject classes or music lessons or reading more pages per day and push them to the outer limits of their schedules because right now life is too full. Ironically, it’s those nuggets of happiness that could reduce stressors and help brighten any day to make life feel worthwhile; instead they become lofty aspirations that people hold off until life settles down and is less “too busy.” When every second matters, all joy is optional; all joy is rendered unnecessary as a task instead of its realities as a necessity.
The reason why we feel “too busy” is because modern society doesn’t create natural pauses. Technology fills the voids that would otherwise welcome quiet contemplation. “Waiting in line? Check your phone. Sitting in traffic? Reading emails. Eating lunch alone? Scroll social media.” We are rarely permitted the time to just be – and it’s in just being that minds decompress and re-center.
No small fixes will get us out of these ruts; we simply need to change our perspectives on minor things like: Don’t multitask – prioritize: Write down the top three things you need to do today and focus on them first. Schedule breaks like appointments: Ten-minute walks, tea breaks or deep breathing pauses are essential. Schedule no-technology time: Mealtimes; conversations; first fifteen minutes upon waking.
Say no more often: Not every request deserves a spot on your schedule, regardless of guilt attachment.
By incorporating these small habits into daily life, busyness can become balance instead. Being busy isn’t a sign of success – Balance is. Life should never feel like it’s a constant mad dash to the finish line. Of course, there will always be to-do lists, responsibilities and deadlines – but there must always be room to breathe, connect, rest and enjoy all of life’s little moments instead of feeling like life is one giant crowded checklist masquerading as full experience. Ultimately being too busy is not about what’s in front of us – but what’s around us – and how we choose to live our lives – even in a chaotic world – with every moment still uniquely ours for the taking.
