She didn’t die because she was loud, bold, or defiant. She died because she said no. The digital age has opened new frontiers – not of progress, but of control, surveillance, and brutal enforcement of old misogynistic norms.
Despite centuries of striving for equality, women still face a higher level of discrimination compared to men in nearly every aspect of life. There are various cases in Pakistan’s history that indicate misogyny against women’s empowerment. The main reason behind this misogyny is the complex interplay of social norms and traditions, power dynamics and men’s psychologies. In this way, we have examples of powerful women like Samia Shahid and Ayman Udas, who were killed by their family members in the name of honour because many societies have traditionally been patriarchal, where men hold positions of power and women are expected to be subservient; similarly, the notion that man’s ego plays a significant role in perpetuating misogyny is compelling.
After too many incidents, recently another woman lost her life. Sana Yousaf, a teenager who was a famous social media influencer, who did not die because of her boldness, her visibility or modernism, but because she turned down a man’s proposal – a man, who believed he deserved her attention, her affection, or may be even her obedience. In addition to this act of aggression, she was unfairly held responsible by public. In fact, all of this brutality is not done by social media but by our analog misogyny. We have inherited centuries of domination and harm into the digital era, and now we are penalizing the girls for accessing the internet with equal intensity. Hence, Asad Baig, a well known writer rightly said in his article that, “Nothing has changed. The control is the same. The rage is same. In short, the men are unchanged. The only thing that has changed is backdrop.”
Actually, we have raised boys to believe they must possess what they want otherwise, the violence or killing women should be there final decision. We have seen this play too many times whether it is the case of Sadia Sheikh, who resisted arranged marriage and wanted to live independently or the Maria Shafqat, who was buried for marrying against the wishes of her family. History has proven that whenever a woman says no, a man cannot accept it. The society always considers women responsible for her own murder; we criticize their attire, their assertiveness, their visibility, and even their quietness. Everyone is ready to blame woman, For instance, if she is exposed, she is careless. If she remains concealed, she must be hiding something. There’s no way to win this game because the rules were designed to trap her.
Every woman who says no, on any platform is at risk not just of heartbreaking but of being erased. This whole region has a femicide problem. But no one called it that. Everyone calls it honour, personal issue, or family tragedy. To conclude addressing this misogyny for women requires a multifaceted approach. First of all, the state institutions need to conduct digital safety workshops against gender based violence. Moreover, the Parents need to teach their boys that their masculinity is not defined by exerting power over women’s body, mind and future. Additionally, the law enforcement agencies must take quick action against women based violence as Islamabad Police did in Sana Yousef’s case. Last but not least, media framing matters deeply. So, there is a need of such media that stops portraying women’s death as morality tales.
